It's not for you

It’s not for you

Why is it that we always think that we deserve whatever we want? Is it because we are under the impression that this life is all out us? Is it because we think that the world really does revolve around us and that this life not matter how long or short should be about us.

Think about it, “This Bud’s for you”, “You only go around once so grab for all you can”, “Have it your way, like there is any other way, duh!”

It’s bred in us, from the moment we wiggle our way out of the womb, it’s all about us. We’re suctioned, cleaned, weighed, measured, put under warm lights (it’s like our very first spa treatment) wrapped in a warm blanket handed over to our mothers, pictures are taken, food is given, diapers once full are now empty. Come on it’s all about us.

We cry in the middle of the night, someone comes running, we fuss and people ask if we are all right, on and on it goes.

No wonder we think that we some how deserve everything we ever wanted.

No wonder we have a world, our world that is constantly looking out for #1, numero uno, me casa not your casa. No wonder a world slips by us and we really haven’t had much of an impact on it, how could we if it’s not about us then move on!

I have an old life, it’s long gone, ok so there are still bits and pieces that float around inside of me and the battle rages everyday to not allow it control, but for the most part it’s gone.

How so you ask, well maybe your not asking, but for those of you who are let me explain. My life changed one night in 1975, March 7^th to be exact. On that night I accepted Jesus Christ into my life, I called out and He answered. That night my old life disappeared and I was given a new one with new opportunities, new hope, new everything. One thing that I have learned though is that night is the night my outlook HAD to change. Not an option, not a “well I’m working on it kind of thing”, nope it was a HAVE to change change.

Jesus Christ commands every follower of Him to die to oneself, and to live for Him. Living for Him means serving Him and serving others. It means that your life, my life are not our own. We have given up the control and have willingly turned it over to the one who has given His all for us.

I’ve figured something out, if you want to live a Christian life with the fullness of what God has for you then stop thinking about yourselves. Stop looking at you. Stop focusing on your needs, your desires, and your world. Christianity isn’t for wimps; it’s not some kind of social club with “special” privileges. Christianity is tough, am I loosing you yet. Maybe I should qualify something- Christianity; true, real Christianity is one that should take us to the Cross. Jesus Christ did it, not for Himself, but for me, for you. His life was lived so that men throughout time could know that they are loved because He gave His life for them.

How much of Christianity today is focused on self. How many churches are focused on “playing to the crowd”? How many lives have gone unnoticed and have been lost because “Christians” were too focused on themselves and not those around them? Only eternity will tell us this, but I know one thing I don’t want to be guilty of this. My hearts cry is, “Lord keep me grounded in you, keep me seeking to have your eyes for the world around me. Keep me wanting; longing to leave an impression on this world not of who I am, but who you have been in me.”

Hear me, Christ gave us principles to live by. One of the greatest is- He died, He gave all not for Himself, but for others.

Life lesson- look at how people react to things. In times of great struggle or disaster, there are always people who put aside their own lives; their own pain, injuries whatever and they go to the need of someone other than themselves. In that moment they look beyond themselves, they forget about themselves and all of a sudden the world isn’t all about them. Can we get there? Our churches shouldn’t be just for those inside the walls, our Christianity shouldn’t just be for those who “like” us. Our reach shouldn’t include me me me. It should be, “Lord I’ll be your hands, I’ll be your feet, and I’ll be your lips”.

This isn’t an instant kind of thing, but it is a ‘I’m going to get there kind of thing”.

Remember this isn’t for you-so get moving.

PMS

So before you get all up in your feelings, let me explain. PMS stands for something, and that something isn't what many of you are thinking. Look at it this way if I would have put BSM, would you have read on? No! How about SPM? Of course not, but PMS sure reached out and grabbed you didn't it?!
PMS, at least for this one time, stands for Parents Must Show. In other words parents you are the chalkboards that young minds learn from. I'm feeling all educational.

So back to PMS. Parenting is modeling, not the kind where way too skinny women/girl people walk down a runway wearing who knows what and looking as if they would eat a pencil eraser if it was handed to them, not that kind.
I'm refer to you, parents. Know this your kids, all kids are big sponges. Their minds are blank slates just waiting to be filled with what they see and hear. Parents you are the first and foremost one to fill their minds, and shape their personality. Now granted every child is born with a personality, but you are the ones who are going to help shape their personality.

We always want our kids to mimic the good things that we say and do, and we gasp when they reflect just the opposite. I'll never forget what a mother told me happened when her 3 year old son was sitting in a shopping cart. He looked over at a older man and said, "Are you one of those old mean people?". Now we all know this feeling don't we? Of course we do, because everyone of us who have children have been there in some way or another.

Now this isn't something that a three year old mind has come up with on their own. Somewhere along the process of educating the brain of this young offspring, someone must have made a comment to the effect that old people are mean. How else would have that have been written on that blank slate? It might have only been one time, but one time is all it takes.
We do effect our kids both good and bad. We must show our kids the proper ways in life and the right ways. We have to be the ones who not just talk a good game, but we live it out in front of their lives.
I had a teacher who by the way will remain completely anonymous, although I will only describe her as a wonderful educator of young lives who is the most caring, understanding, tolerant, patient and compassionate person you would ever want to meet. (Ok you know who you are, I know you read this blog, remember that you are first and foremost a great baker and that it's been awhile, I'm just saying)

So she relates this story to me which I want to pass on to you. This week school started, she teaches 3rd grade. I guess they all sit in a circle and play a word game so that everyone can say their name and what they like. It has to go along with the first letter of their first name. For example, Hi my name is Ann and I like apples, or Hi my name is Bill and I like beef, or Hi my name is Phil and I like to fish.
So they are all in a circle and things are moving right along until a little girl says her first name and then this comes out of her mouth, "I hate German people". Whaaaaat?
The teacher asked why she would say something like that and the girl, now remember she's a 3rd grader, says this, "My Grandmother was in WWll and she hates German people. Now I can only reason that possibly this grandmother was held in a concentration camp and saw horrible things, BUT in my opinion the same thing that caused a nation to think that they were somehow better than any other and which let them justify the murders of millions, now has been inbred into this young mind.
How sad, how wrong. Parents your the key, your the ones who are loading up the minds and hearts of your kids. Parents must show them the way, the right way.
Hang in there and know that good kids don't come by accident. Remember PMS

abc FAMILY? what?

Many of us have heard the story/parable of the frog and the boiling water, if not here's a brief synopsis:
To boil a frog, not that I condone such behavior, one must put the frog in a pot of water that has yet to get warm. If you place the frog in there and then turn up the heat eventually the frog will be boiled to death. Now on the other side of things, if the water is boiling and you would put a frog in a pot, the frog would immediately jump out.
Point of story- the ways of this world is to slowly boil us to death.
Last night my wife and I watch a show on, now let me highlight this for you, ABC Family.

Now one might think, gee what loosers-they're watching a kids station, my response to that is, "hey shut up your stupid!".

Anyway back to what I was saying; the show was a new one called; Melissa & Joey. Now I am not going to write about the plot, because that really isn't what is important here. I am writing about how the frog is being boiled and it sure seems like not a whole lot of people are noticing, especially parents. If they are then ABC should be flooded with complaints.
On the two episodes that we watched, back to back by the way. I kept saying to my wife, "this is ABC Family, family really?".

During this so called kids program on a so called family channel the number of swear words was appalling . They weren't just using what one might called, "minor", ones, but ones that when I was a kid everyone one around would have gasped for air! Along with that there was numerous sexual innuendos and continual comments from the two female characters about getting, "taken advantage of and liking it". I could go on and on, but I wouldn't.

The kids of today are being programed more than any other generation by the media. Parents of times gone by had it a whole lot "easier" than those today, in the sense of knowing who and what is shaping their kids lives. Things were clearer back in the day. Today, ABC Family, to me that sounds like a station I could depend upon to air good FAMILY safe programing. NO!
Parents you are the main line of defence for your kids. It's no one's job but yours. In parenting you can never take things as they seem. You must investigate everything that your kid sees, hears and is exposed to. You must. The pot is boiling and the frog is getting weaker. Nothing is happening because so many are in the same pot.

I believe that there is a plan, just so you know I'm not writing this with tin foil on my head so the aliens can't read my thoughts, (I only have it over my ears). The plan is for kids today to be so lax and numb to such things that when they parent the standards are going to be even lower than they are today. So here's a question, whats that going to look like? What are the generations to come going to see are moral and right. Yea maybe I am an old prude and as I have said before I am a dinosaur, but at least I can feel the water getting hotter and know enough to let others know-"hey get your frog out of the pot".

You're shocked, really?

Please don't tell me you’re shocked? It never fails to amaze me how people ignore warnings/signs of harm and danger and then after something happens they are shocked by it. Here are some examples:

Back in the spring a trainer for a KILLER whale was killed by the animal. We all saw it on the news. If you were like me my heart broke for this trainer’s family. The reports came flooding in about how this trainer ever since she was a young child, all she wanted to do was to work with animals like this. We found out that she was doing what she loved, awesome. Not too soon after this the public cries began. We find out that this KILLER whale had KILLED 2 other people prior to this tragedy. Next we start to hear how this KILLER whale is a KILLER and maybe the KILLER whale should be put down. Question what part of KILLER whale didn't anybody understand?

I was watching a program I believed it is called, "When vacations go bad". Now if you have never seen this show I am sure there are all kinds of thoughts running through your memories of such vacations.
Such as when you booked a hotel room for your honeymoon mainly for 3 reasons. One- it had an ocean view, two- right on the boardwalk, three and not necessarily the most important reason, but it sure would seem like that at the time- $60 cheaper per night than any other hotel room in the area (sign). Only to discover after driving 7 hours you pull up to the address given and see the "hotel". It was above a hot dog/hamburger joint right on the boardwalk, no air conditioning, blinds hanging lopsided flapping in the breeze, but then the "paste De resistance" (that's French by the way) the look on the patrol officers face after you asked him if that was the Sunview Motel and you had booked a room in this "hotel"-priceless.

On this particular episode there were divers feeding a moray eel, (Strophidon sathete), mini hot dogs. The moray eel is soooo cute that the locals have even named her, Molly. Well since this video is on this particular show one can only sit with great anticipation for the "go bad" part to go bad. As this one diver is pulling mini hot dogs out of a Ziploc bag, Molly the moral eel, the eel that is solid muscle and has the brain capacity of a walnut, who by the way also has one very interesting trait:
Moray eels' heads are too narrow to create the negative pressure that most fish use to swallow prey. Quite possibly because of this, they have a second set of jaws in their throat called pharyngeal jaws, which also possess teeth. When feeding, morays launch these jaws into the mouth, where they grasp prey and transport it into the throat and digestive system. Moray eels are the only animal that uses pharyngeal jaws to actively capture and restrain prey. Larger morays are capable of seriously wounding humans.hmmmmm

So here's the bad going bad part. I love this show! Man/knucklehead- was petting Molly as he was hand feeding her the mini hot dogs. Trouble is Molly was a tad hungry this particular day and was rather short on patience. Man/knucklehead couldn't get the mini hot dog out of the bag fast enough. You could see the juice from the mini hot dogs being release into the water and Molly swimming through it. The more she swam through it the more she anticipated another mini hot dog. Man/knucklehead couldn't get it out of the bag fast enough so Molly decided to take charge, and oh boy did she ever. Now understand there is sound on this video. You see Molly turn on man/knucklehead and there is this really loud crunching sound, followed by screaming rapid pulling of the mans/knuckleheads hand, then a red cloud replacing the hot dog juice. Oh the moment! Later they interview the man/knucklehead who had to have his big toe removed so they could attach it for his new thumb which Molly had mistaken for a mini hot dog because said man/knucklehead couldn't get them out of the bag fast enough. He said he was shocked that this happened-what?! You were shocked, really. You really didn't see anything going wrong here? Helen Keller could have seen this one coming!

I could go on and on, but most of you who read this have the same attention span as I, "oh look shiny", so I'll wrap it up. Why are we shocked, why do we ignore the warning signs? Reason we never think that they pertain to us. Is it that we always think that we are beyond such things? So when the warnings we ignore happen we are shocked. Throughout life we are given many warnings and yet we still ignore the signs. We still try to beat the train even though the gates are coming down and the lights are flashing. We speed up when the light turns yellow instead of applying the brakes. We ignore the warning labels on various products that read-causes cancer. We just think that the tightness in our chest and the pain in our left arm is just a pinched nerve. Life has never guaranteed us a second chance; often times you only get one. Signs aren't just there so Mel and his family can hide in the closet with tin foil on their heads.

Pay attention, don't get caught off guard, think before you act and most of all -don't be shocked when something happens if you choose to ignore them.That's all I have to say on this.

28,000

28,000 since 2006. This is the number of people who have died in Mexico from drug violence according to the Chicago tribune, 8-5-2010.

28,000 and this doesn't even count those here in the US that have died because of violence or the result of using drugs.

28,000, that is twenty eight thousand people have died. Does that bother anyone??? Now I realize that in that number there are many who are a part of the drug cartels, but there is also a large number who are innocent bystanders.

To think that this many people in such a short time have lost their lives blows me away. Now many might say well that's sad but what does this have to do with me? Simple, if you use drugs, yes even smoke pot, because pot is a drug you moron, you are directly contributing to the death toll in Mexico.

I see it like this, the reason there are drug cartels is because there is a demand for such products. These cartels fill the demand with the product needed. If the demand stopped the product would stop, which in turn would stop the killing. Yet the demand isn't slowing because many here in the US think nothing of it. What's the big deal, I'm only smoking a little weed. I want you to think about this, because it's the hard truth, next time you go to light up I want you to picture putting a gun to another human beings head and you personally pulling the trigger. Yep that's right, you pulled the trigger. You took part in the senseless murder of another.

There is no such thing as a harmless drug nor; and this gets the vein in my neck to bulge out, are you only affecting your own life. Lie, lie lie lie!!!

That's our trouble we always want to only think of ourselves and our actions aren't affecting anyone else. Maybe that's why people get into cars and drive drunk, maybe that's why people have no problem denying their family necessities of life so that they can simply "relax".

I see the outcomes of these types of decisions. I sit with kids whose parents really only care about themselves why else would they continue with their addiction. I go to rehab centers and psych wards and see the faces of people who have had their lives stripped away by drugs. The reasoning is the same, what's the big deal. What's the big deal? What?

Come on people take the responsibility you should. If your going to use drugs then fess up to the fact that you have taken part in murdering 28,000 people. Come on get some guts and be honest-you have. Here in the States we think nothing of this. It's not our problem, we are not part of it-wrong on all sides.

It is your problem, you are a part of it. Quit hiding, quit sticking you head in the sand and pretending that this is another countries problem. It's not. It's about time for the people of the home of the brave and the land of the free to take responsibility for their actions.

Man I am steamed right now, you might pick this up from my writing, in fact I wouldn't be surprised if as you read this you can hear the pounding that my computer is taking.

SUV's are bad

Today was one of those days when I know that there is a true battle for this generation of young people. Many might say that it's no different then when we were kids, to that I say-"You have no idea!".

I once read something to the effect that the generations that go before us are to leave a legacy, a path for the next generation to follow. This path is to lead them towards a better life and greater things than what they had. Sad to say, but I'm really not seeing this much.

One of the biggest failures I see of my generation is that we haven't really fought hard enough for this current generation. Please note that when I say fight I mean fight. Maybe you know what I'm talking about. Sad to say many of you will not because somewhere along the line "fighting" has turned into an evil thing sort of like SUV's.

Ok keep up, you might be thinking what, SUV. Look anytime there is an accident involving an SUV. look at how it is reported- "Today an SUV was involved in an accident!",. it's almost evil in a sense, there is this impression that this SUV drove itself and was out hunting for prey. How come they never say, "Today a 4 door sedan or a mini van was involved in an accident!". Oh no a SUV, right away we come to the conclusion- SUV's are bad.....

Same thing with fighting- it has taken on a evil context so no one really likes to talk abbot it. My opinion/ as I see it is we have soften things up so much that the world and all it's influences have been given an open invitation to rob us of this generation of youth. How? Simple-I never see the world's influences backing down. I never see drugs, alcohol, gangs, violence backing down, in fact I see it gaining steam. Why shouldn't it? I mean really we stand by and let a generation slip though our hands because we are afraid to act or we simply choose to ignore the problem and believe that everything will simply work out for the best. Look at us.

Yea look at us. We didn't turn out that bad, but I must say I don't know about you, but I know the way I grew up- things weren't simply left alone. I had parents, even though they were divorced who would get up in my grill. I had neighbors that had no problem busting my chops and then taking me home to let my parents add to the "life lesson". I had teachers that I feared, yes feared, because i knew that they were in control and God help anyone who thought different.

I look at all this and think, they all had a part in shaping me, the key is they weren't afraid to step in for a fight. I believe that those who did that for me and for others did so because they saw the value in fighting for us. Was it because our parents were products of war. They saw that somethings are simply worth fighting for. They knew what the consequences would be if they did nothing. So they did something.

Parents do something! Parents fight for your kids! Parents take responsibility and quit looking for excuses of why you can't.

Fighting for your kids is one fight you should never run away from, nor; and I know this might be upsetting to you "time out" people, should you wait around for the world and it's influences to throw the first "punch". Take a more aggressive approach- fight for them.

Back to the opening sentence. Today was one of those days, here's why.

Today I had a great time but at the same time it was saddening to me. Let me explain. For the past 24 years I have been speaking in the public schools, doing various assemblies on various topics. When I go into a school I know that the things I have to say will strike a nerve and it may take sometime for it to sink in, but I believe that this generation is worth telling the truth to.

This morning I had my first school of the '10-'11 school year. Today I was at a facility that houses 45 young men. It is a mandatory facility and program ordered by the courts. Many are there for 6-9 months minimum. They are there because of substance abuse, alcohol, criminal violations etc. Today I spoke before a great bunch of young men. Now if you had been there with me you might have thought differently, but anytime I speak to young people I see the good, the positive the potential. Now please know this, that doesn't mean that they weren't at times knuckleheads, because they were, but I saw something in their eyes. That something was, hey tell me the truth, don't hold back, yea I'm not going to like it, but are you willing to fight for me anyway; that look.

So I did, and that's' where I can say that it was a great time. The sad part was seeing these young men with their lives in a shambles, a few I met are already fathers with small children, I wondered what their kids are going to step into. The world had lied to them, they believed all that they were told. Did anyone step in front of them to fight off the worlds influence? I wonder. Are there parents in the picture that are more concerned about their kids than their issues? I wonder.

Hearing the staff tell me that their biggest concern is when these young men go home- what kind of support system is there for them.

It's time to take the gloves off, the world has fought that way for a long time. It's time to beieve once again in a generation, this generation.

Always remember they are worth fighting for, they really are.

Dial 911

Are you serious? Go figure them out, what kind of idiotic advice is this? Go figure them out, geez, go figure them out, hmmmm, go figure them out.

Kids don't come with direction as far as a written booklet, but for sure kids need direction.
A child is designed (by God) to grow and flourish in an atmosphere of love. Love is translated in many different ways but one of the most important ways is through the giving of direction.
Imagine going on a trip to a place you have never been. Imagine going without looking at any map. How lost would you be?? I know people who get lost as their GPS is shouting, turn here stupid!
Anyway-you wouldn't do such a thing because if you have no direction you'll never arrive at your destination, your goal.

Kids are this way-they need direction so they can achieve all that they should, which by the way is to their fullest potential. They need aimed in the right direction so they can get to where they have to go. Directions, correction, encouragement is what kids need, and especially teens.
When there are directions given, kids have a feeling of security. Please note: I have never met a young person/teen who is excited about you giving direction nor have I ever met one who hangs on your every correction-but it doesn't matter they still need them. If they do say something to this effect- "Oh Mom, oh Dad, you’re the best! I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me correction and giving me direction all of which my friends are not receiving and they are getting to do stupid things, while I on the other hand am not-THANK YOU. If this occurs, dial 911-your having an aneurysm!

No one likes direction to be given to them. Adults don't like it. Watch the face of someone who has been pulled over for speeding, all the officer is trying to do is give them directions (even if it is to the nearest courthouse or ATM), but its still direction.
As parents we need to give our children directions even when they think that they have it all figured out. We need to care enough about them to look them in the eye and say this is how it’s going to be. Now if you attempt to start this for the first time in their adolescent years, good luck-be prepared for some serious battles. The reason, simple this should have started when the day they were born. I'm not saying it’s too late, "it's too late baby now it's too late though we really did try and make it", sorry I regressed, digressed???? No I just heard that line of that song in my head and had to get it out.

If your kids are older, remember back with me. Remember when the nurse took your child and measured them, weighed them, took their footprints, (I guess that makes sense since there are so many crimes committed with peoples feet) they then wrapped them in one of those receiving blankets nice and tight and handed them back to you. My first thought was; "hey he looks like a piece of cord wood", but again that's just me. There was that little life all nice and snug-they were safe. Now remember when you would unwrap them. I used to grab one end and pull spinning them like a top, oh the fun, kidding! Their little arms went way out as if they had been startled by something, that sense of security was now gone, they were out, exposed, literally.
Directions are to a pre-teen/teen as that security blanket is to an infant. There is place and a need for them, parents let's figure them out.